Horrasias Balabyekkubo

Date: April 13, 2015

Name: ManTalks – World Class Role Models, Fathers & Sons

Presenters: Andy Zaremba, Ricky Shetty, Horrasias Balabyekkubo, and Dai Manuel

Mentors and role models are important for leaders. With the right role models, leaders will able to exceed their limitation of what they can be and what they want to be. The purpose of mentors and role models are to help leaders to find their deep and long term success, fulfilment and happiness in their journeys. Role models can be powerful because they can awake leaders’ inner voice that can control the direction of their success. ManTalks invites Andy Zaremba, the Co-Founder of Float House, Ricky Shetty, the owner of DaddyBlogger, Horrasias Balabyekkubo, the founder of Cleft of the Rock Foundation, and Dai Manuel, the COO of Fitness Town Inc. The panel will share their experience, knowledge and life lessons to support leaders to develop inner connection with their mentors and role models.

Fatherhood experience from Andy Zaremba

Andy Zaremba is the Co-Founder of Float House and the Co-host of the Vancouver Real Podcast. He has a strong passion to strive to become the best man in his family. Moreover, Zaremba believes personal growth is ongoing process and he will continue to expand his living to life journey.

Zaremba shares his first experience of role model is from his father. His father wants him to step up; instead, Zaremba receives a strong pressure and later realizes it is not his father’s fault o put everything on him.

Zaremba indicates role models can be anybody who can provide attention to the audience. However, mentor is different. Mentors have more experience than others. They can help leaders to guide their lives and keep them accountable. Zaremba mentions his second role model that impacts his life is a doctor who is treating addiction. His honest and wisdom inspire his life and helps him to continue his journey.

“Live it now, takes the principle”

Zaremba starts to take people to meditation. He believes medication is the technique that can help people to go through rough times. Zaremba shares his rough experience that his wife is experiencing UTI infection during her second trimester. In the hospital, they might need to sacrifice their baby to save her life. In the end, his wife recovers, but the baby is premature. Knowing he has no control to treat the baby, he is scared to death. He uses medication technique to calm himself down.

After seeing the documentary, Zaremba learns premature baby will die without love and care. Physical contact is important. He believes the challenge is there for a reason. The risk is high, but he will get through it and keep going forward.

Being a father changes Zaremba. He changes his view of family and starts to take care of himself better.

“Take care of yourself first before being a role model for someone else”

Fatherhood experience from Ricky Shetty

Ricky Shetty operates a website called DaddyBlogger that helps father’s parenting. Shetty also conducts workshops and conference events to help improve bloggers’ personal growth experience. The passion from fatherhood helps Shetty to become a better father.

Shetty shares his parents are together from arranged marriage. However, from Shetty’s childhood, Shetty only remembers fighting and yelling. There is a lack of communication and as a child, Shetty becomes shy and broken. The family breakdown affects his life. In University, Shetty wants to find a way to change his life. His first role model is Vancouver Canucks and he is willing to line up to meet the players. However, Shetty realizes they are just models.

People look up celebrities, but mentors look into people and invest in them. A friend of Shetty is a father and willing to invest into him without any judging changes his live. Shetty indicates mentor is someone who has the ability to listen.

“When he believes me, I start to believe in myself”

Shetty shares his experience in Japan to teach English. In Japan, he is trying to find his purpose and his soul mate. However, he learns a broken man will not have any woman. If women leave her men, the men are reliable and need to man up.

“Feel like a coconut. Brown outside, white inside”

Travelling around Asia helps Shetty to find his spiritually from god. He is able to forgive his father to release his pain. Shetty wants people to know that when people who do not get married in late age, they usually afraid they will be like his father. Shetty wants those people to know they have choices.

Shetty is happily married and he cares about the next generation. He is able to find his identity of family. Shetty finds his purpose from blogging and see the success he can bring to people.

Shetty shares as entrepreneurs, they need 3 things

• Mentor
• Mastermind
• Accountable partner

“Power of listening and the gift of listening and receiving”

Fatherhood experience from Horrasias Balabyekkubo

Horrasias Balabyekkubo is the founder of Cleft of the Rock Foundation and also the director of Nakyessa Christian Primary and Secondary school. His foundation utilizes the tool of entrepreneurship to educate people in areas of Uganda. He is also a motivational speaker and a writer of “Death of the Gospel”. His passion of creating opportunities for people inspires many leaders to engage community development.

Balabyekkubo believes he is born with a purpose of trying to create adventure for people. In young age, Balabyekkubo’s parents change his life around because his parents believe they can change the next generation. With singing and praying, his father is his mentor of true love. Balabyekkubo wants to become like his father, who provide the best to others with love.

Balabyekkubo shares his father is his role model. His father impact his heart and his father always believe Balabyekkubo is born for great thing. Following his father’s footstep, his soul purpose is to love the children. Balabyekkubo likes to take pictures because picture can capture the excitement. His conscious decision wants him to being the kind of father he has.

“Do not let children to feel their dad is not there”

Balabyekkubo’s children are his hero. When his children are born, he feels his father has passed down the mission to him. The mission is to show his children the savior of mankind. When everything falls apart, children look up to Balabyekkubo. Moreover, he wants his children to understand they are black. Balabyekkubo understand the reality can hurt them due to difference nationality and the outside world can be crude. However, it is his responsibility to protect, provide and presence to his children.

Many people save time on vacation more than their families. It is important to look at the life 10 years after to see the impact. Balabyekkubo’s father teaches him the power of love and the more love he gives, the more he gain.

“Teach people what is right”

Fatherhood experience from Dai Manuel

Dai Manuel has over 20 years of experience in health and fitness industry. He is also the COO of Fitness Town. Manuel has the passion to inspire and help the community. As a motivational speaker, his experience inspires many entrepreneurs through tough time.

Dai Manuel shares his moment of life changes. The biggest one is his grandfather. Manuel’s grandfather is deaf, but he always put “I love you” on a piece of paper. Action speaks louder than words. Manuel believes everyone is writing his or her own history and story, and he sees many similarities from people sharing their milestone.

Manuel’s parents are divorced at age of 9. Manuel creates the habit of eating to comfort the pain. The depression leads him to become over weight and thinking of suicide. He begins to seek for help by go to library and learn. Unfortunately, Manuel is still unable to accept the condition since the dialogue is running his mind over and over again. Manuel left Ontario to escape the reality.

Manuel believes his parents are his role model for work. As a workaholic, he stops listening to others. Moreover, he needs to have another deep conversation with himself. He stops drinking because of his wife. Manual does not treat his wife well which leads to separation. When his daughter is born, he starts to make promises to his daughter to change. 7 years later, Manuel experiences another rock bottom and got separated again with his wife. However, his wife still sees him as the person who can do more. This is what Manuel needs, which is mentorship. Mentorship can help people understand who they are.

“Who do you want your daughter to marry? Be that person”

4 things man need to know

• I am sorry
• I did not mean to
• I love you
• Please forgive me

Manuel shares that he thought he figure everything out, but he did not. Manuel wants his kids to be proud. In addition, he has the choice and he has the ability to change.

The panel

For daily practice, Zaremba does Yoga. Shetty reads 10 pages and pray. Balabyekkubo gives grace to others and Manuel reflects every night. Zaremba recommends leaders to be vulnerable and do not be afraid to be judged. Manuel recommends leaders to share as much as they can. Shetty recommends leaders to understand everyone can be broken sometimes. Balabyekkubo recommends leaders to show up as much as they can in their lives.

Balabyekkubo shares when everything is down, the decision of being the legendary man help him up. Zaremba suggests people to build up self-talk. Shetty suggests people to overcome the bad day with authentic mindset because bad day leads to better day. Lastly, Balabyekkubo suggests people to let things happen and step it up.